Understanding Life, Love and Pain

I’ve experienced it all, the bittersweet taste of life. Love, pain, confusion, bitterness, the feeling of being completely worthless, heartbreak, depression and yet I survived.

In life, love is a beautiful experience. Yes, it will always bring pain and God knows what else… but it also brings joy and a feeling of being complete that none of us can ever explain. From my own experience, I’d rather have love and lost, than never to have loved at all. I’ve experienced pain, but I’ve also experienced a little moments of happiness, and I’ll never trade that little happiness for anything. I am who I am now not only because of the good things, but basically because of the bad moments I went through. We experience these painful moments so we could well appreciate the good things in our lives. Sometimes, it is a good thing that the Lord allows some things to happen to us, to make us stronger and wiser than we were before.The quicker we learn and accept things, the better we will be. 

Without love, we will never be complete. Love is what makes the world go round as they say, it is the force that keeps us innately good. I wouldn’t blame love for the pain it brings, nor will I hold grudges against it for the misery it caused, instead I will thank God for it. We get wounds from it, but those wounds will heal eventually but, it’s not like magic that poof! it’s all healed. It should start within ourselves too. Pain is just but a reminder, that we have lessons to learn, joys to look forward to, and a God to go to in times of need. Don’t be scared to love and and experience the pain because it’s part of LIFE. Grieve from it,  but it's important that  when you decide to grieve,  you don't have to shed a certain number of tears, get angry all you want, but don’t be consumed by bitterness because of it, think that life doesn't stop for your pain. Instead, learn from it and use it to become the best person you can be.

I remember when I was young, I always find myself talking to MYSELF saying… “Be strong. Remember, not everything has a happy ending and endings don’t mean stop!". It’s just a way of telling ourselves that there’s a new beginning ahead of us. You should always be ready for the unpredictable and expect the unexpected.  It’s easy to fall, hard to get up. But once you’re up and back on track, you will be a better person. That’s the way of life! You don’t just live it, you learn from it.”

Believe me.... not all lessons in life can be taught, you have to live through it!

Past Hurts

Past hurts that linger in the memory can be very painful, it can definitely destroy one's self esteem and confidence.Everyone has gone through heartaches and going through it can be very tough. It’s normal to feel sad, angry, exhausted, frustrated and confused. You also may feel anxious about the future. Know that reactions like these will lessen over time. 


Losing someone you love is very painful, you may experience all kinds of difficult and surprising emotions. Sometimes it may feel like the sadness will never let up. While these feelings can be frightening and overwhelming, But they are normal reactions to loss. Accepting them as part of the grieving process and allowing yourself to feel what you feel is necessary for healing.

The memories of the good times you had can be almost impossible to forget. It can seem that everything you look at sparks of some sort of painful remembrance. But there are things you can do to get through this difficult time like reaching out to others for support. Even in the midst of the sadness and stress of your loss, you have an opportunity to learn from the experience and grow into a stronger, wiser person. 


Just because you are feeling emptiness in your life right now, doesn’t mean that nothing is happening or that things will never change. It’s important not to let these emotions drag on and affect our life so much. Learning from your mistakes is the key to not repeating them.

MISTAKES

Nobody likes making mistakes. But you must also realize that mistakes are an essential part of self improvement. Don’t be overwhelmed with guilt and regret, analyze how you can learn from them.

* Apologize with Dignity

If you’ve made mistakes that harm other people, it is important to offer a dignified apology. Be clear that it was an unfortunate incident that will not be repeated. A good apology can go along way to restoring trust.

If you don’t apologize, out of embarrassment or unwillingness, the offended person will hold it against you. If your apology is sincere, the other person is likely to forgive you.

* Don’t Waste Time Trying to Justify Mistakes

Unfortunately, it is our natural instinct to try to justify our actions. When you make a mistake, theinitial reaction is to blame someone else.

We justify mistakes for the sake of our ego. Sometimes it is best to say, very simply — yes, I made a mistake.

* Avoid Repeating Mistakes

You should avoid feeling guilty about making mistakes, but at the same time, you should make a resolution to learn from them.

* Mistakes are Opportunities to Learn

From your own mistakes you can gain wisdom and accelerate self-improvement.



We must understand that we're only human.Accept that we will make mistakes and that we are not perfect.

Sometimes I feel like I'm stuck in your head and I wonder who you think you're talking to

I personally dont like this song. However, I can entirely relate to the lyrics. So, just think of it as a poem instead. 

Just want to share.

Tell me what you think about it.

Well there's nothing I truly desire
There's nothing that I really want
But the times I find myself in the fire
You choose between the right and the wrong

I wish I could control all my judgements
Understand every move
Take my mind and all of it’s voices
Tell me what should I do

Sometimes I feel like I’m stuck in your head
And I wonder (who d'you think you're talking to)
One day I’ll move get away
From these feelings getting stronger (who d'you think you're talking to)
Sometimes I feel like it's not so fun
To see what's under (who d'you think you're talking to)
Let me out let me out
I don’t think I can stand it any longer (who d'you think you're talking to)

I remember being part of that era
I remember being so far from home
All the times I needed someone to hear me
Cos I’ve never felt so much on my own

All the trouble that you have with your future
All the rules that make your life so secure
There are people who will give their opinions
But tell me what do they know 

From:  Five O'clock Heroes - Who

To Hold On or To Let Go?

Heartbreak is the number one thing that can destroy motivation..losing someone you love takes away all the reasons to go on living..it may be overrated but most certainly feels that way..if you choose to believe in love then you should be prepared for the opposite: losing it..this is where we get into the nitty gritty of holding on vs letting go..when your mind tries to keep holding on to something, it keeps playing back the memories over and over..the mind is tracking back everything that has happened..so by holding on to those memories, you are stuck in a prison within your mind..there is a natural process in life that involves letting go as there cannot be an inhale without having to exhale, so life itself does not complete its expression until it lets go..however, often we resist the letting go part..how long may we hold on to the past before it becomes a deadening action on one’s own potential and future..some people let themselves deteriorate along with the ghosts of the past..change is harder to some than others, but there’s no denying it as an integral process of life..there’s really no way to keep seasons from changing spring to summer then fall to winter..we harvest the crops and then let go, only to discover new growth in the spring..like it would be foolish to try to hold onto the tomato plant..we could shield it from the cold and snow, but it would still die..our actions would be futile and a waste of time..nature knows that what grows must die and that new growth will come..how then can we approach the many circumstances in our lives when we face a time of letting go?  it is by loving that we are able to let go easily and with grace, knowing there will be new growth somewhere as a result..if dear friends announces their move hundreds of miles away, let your love of them and happiness for their great new life ease the loss of their sweet loving presence in your everyday routine..recognize with love that it is an important step in their life thus celebrate it rather than mourn their departure..loving and letting go can be applied as well to numerous other situations..perhaps the best that we can do when we face a situation or circumstance that calls us to let go is to go deeply into the love that is there..in recognizing the love present, we can find peace in letting go and an ability to see the new life that becomes possible..we can let go through loving, because love never dies even though the person is gone, the situation will surely end sometime..this is a no brainer cold truth, but why does it hurt like hell?  does it mean it’s still worth holding on to?

Don't be judgemental

Look for and recognize the good in yourself and in others. We are all capable of so-called "good" and "bad" behaviors and we all have our "good" and "off" days. We are all unique and it is wonderful that we are different and not all the same - in our appearance, our thoughts, our opinions, our likes and dislikes. Being different is not threatening, it is not "bad", it is just "different". Embrace the differences and be happy for the variety. And pleasssseeee, forget the concepts of "right" and "wrong". People are not good or bad or right or wrong, they just are. If you were in "their shoes" maybe you would act differently, or maybe not. Being judgmental wastes time and cuts you off from opportunities and meaningful relationships - because you are NOT perfect either, and your judgment might be WORSE than the person's you are judging!

Never judge a book by it's cover.

Remember the GOLDEN RULE: We should treat others as we want to be treated.