...says it all

Enhancing Relationships - NO OVERPOWERING

Many relationships fail because one party tries to overpower another,or demands too much. People in love tend to think that love will conquer all and their partner will change the bad habits after marriage. Actually, this is not the case. There is a Chinese saying which carries the meaning that "It is easier to reshape a mountain or a river than a person's character." 

It is not easy to change. Thus, having high expectation on changing the partner's character will cause disappointment and unpleasantness. 

It would be less painful to change ourselves and lower our expectations.. 

Enhancing Relationships - PATIENCE

This is a true story which happened in the States. A man came out of his home to admire his new truck. To his puzzlement, his three-year-old son was happily hammering dents into the shiny paint of the truck. The man ran to his son, knocked him away, hammered the little boy's hands into pulp as punishment. When the father calmed down, he rushed his son to the hospital. 

Although the doctor tried desperately to save the crushed bones, he finally had to amputate the fingers from both the boy's hands. When the boy woke up from the surgery & saw his bandaged stubs, he innocently said, " Daddy,I'm sorry about your truck." Then he asked, "but when are my fingers going to grow back?" The father went home & committed 
suicide. 

Think about this story the next time someone steps on your feet or you wish to take revenge. Think first before u lose your patience with someone u love. Trucks can be repaired.. Broken bones & hurt feelings often can't. Too often we fail to recognize the difference between the person and the performance. We forget that forgiveness is greater than revenge. 

People make mistakes. We are allowed to make mistakes. But the actions we take while in a rage will haunt us forever. 

NO POINTING FINGERS

A man asked his father-in-law, "Many people praised you for a successful marriage. Could you please share with me your secret?" 
The father-in-law answered in a smile, "Never criticize your wife for her shortcomings or when she does something wrong. Always bear in mind that because of her shortcomings and weaknesses, she could not find a better husband than 
you." 

We all look forward to being loved and respected. Many people are afraid of losing face. Generally, when a person makes a mistake, he would look around to find a scapegoat to point the finger at. This is the start of a war. We should always remember that when we point one finger at a person, the other fou! r fingers are pointing at ourselves. 

If we forgive the others, others will ignore our mistake too. 

Past Hurts

Past hurts that linger in the memory can be very painful, it can definitely destroy one's self esteem and confidence.Everyone has gone through heartaches and going through it can be very tough. It’s normal to feel sad, angry, exhausted, frustrated and confused. You also may feel anxious about the future. Know that reactions like these will lessen over time. 


Losing someone you love is very painful, you may experience all kinds of difficult and surprising emotions. Sometimes it may feel like the sadness will never let up. While these feelings can be frightening and overwhelming, But they are normal reactions to loss. Accepting them as part of the grieving process and allowing yourself to feel what you feel is necessary for healing.

The memories of the good times you had can be almost impossible to forget. It can seem that everything you look at sparks of some sort of painful remembrance. But there are things you can do to get through this difficult time like reaching out to others for support. Even in the midst of the sadness and stress of your loss, you have an opportunity to learn from the experience and grow into a stronger, wiser person. 


Just because you are feeling emptiness in your life right now, doesn’t mean that nothing is happening or that things will never change. It’s important not to let these emotions drag on and affect our life so much. Learning from your mistakes is the key to not repeating them.

MISTAKES

Nobody likes making mistakes. But you must also realize that mistakes are an essential part of self improvement. Don’t be overwhelmed with guilt and regret, analyze how you can learn from them.

* Apologize with Dignity

If you’ve made mistakes that harm other people, it is important to offer a dignified apology. Be clear that it was an unfortunate incident that will not be repeated. A good apology can go along way to restoring trust.

If you don’t apologize, out of embarrassment or unwillingness, the offended person will hold it against you. If your apology is sincere, the other person is likely to forgive you.

* Don’t Waste Time Trying to Justify Mistakes

Unfortunately, it is our natural instinct to try to justify our actions. When you make a mistake, theinitial reaction is to blame someone else.

We justify mistakes for the sake of our ego. Sometimes it is best to say, very simply — yes, I made a mistake.

* Avoid Repeating Mistakes

You should avoid feeling guilty about making mistakes, but at the same time, you should make a resolution to learn from them.

* Mistakes are Opportunities to Learn

From your own mistakes you can gain wisdom and accelerate self-improvement.



We must understand that we're only human.Accept that we will make mistakes and that we are not perfect.

writing what i feel...

There was a time when I used to think that in order to write you just need a topic and a sense of direction. I am still being taught the ‘techniques’ to write,  the difference between active and passive writing and above all, the RULES to write, but I have learned that writing is not just about rules and logic, it is also about emotions. It comes from inside. It is something that you can't really learn. You can't learn to be creative, it's just there in a person and there is a time and place when it is going to come out. I get those days when I really want to write but can't get past a few words, and then there are those days that I am surprised by looking at how fast I can type. Sometimes my thoughts flow faster than my typing speed and it's hard to keep up with them. :)

I am an emotional person (very emotional). I normally do things with feelings. I can’t write if I can't feel it. I don’t want to write if I don’t feel it. My writings usually come from the heart and not from my mind. It is true that every writer/blogger has an inspiration, which he/she looks up to. It could be someone or something. For some, it is knowledge, for others it's the time of the day. Some are inspired by places like a beach or a particular store etc.. For me, it has always been LIFE, my life, my never ending journey, more failures and less successes and LOVE, for others friends, family (exist or may not exist) and love for myself.....

My purpose of blogging/writing is not to show how intellectual I am or to show that I'm right. Looking back on my life, I have been blessed to have the opportunity to do and see a variety of things.  So all my experiences led me to have definite understanding, opinions, beliefs and views on different stages and issues about life and love, that's why I understand  first before I comment.  I read or listen before I speak. And I believe it’s more beneficial to listen and learn from others’ experiences as well as their ideas, and to be open and humble enough to, if not accept or agree with, at least consider another way of doing or seeing things.

I like expressing myself silently instead of speaking out loud sometimes . Through this, I'm able to express myself without burdening anyone by asking them to listen to what I've got to say.

You may wonder why I write today. I write, simply because I feel like writing.